Want To Have Better Connection With Your Kids? Here Are Five Tips!

Family CounselingOctober 1, 2019

Small kids are dependent on their parents for every little thing, hence the connection is great at that time. However, as they grow up, it deteriorates for some reason or another. Ideally, it is this parent-child connection that helps them bond better and makes the kids more compliant to listen to their parents. The biggest complaint parents often have against their kids is that they do not listen to them. So if you face that, too, you would need to strengthen your connection with your kids. Scientists have said that parents should have five positive interactions for one negative interaction with their children. Imagine all your interactions with your children throughout the day. Do you think there are more negative interactions than positive ones? If you truly want to establish and maintain a better and more positive connection with your child, here are five positive ways to do so:

12 Hugs A Day

No, it is not a joke. Therapists say that we need 4 hugs a day for survival and 8 hugs a day for growth. Hence, a total of 12 hugs a day is best for your children. It doesn’t have to always be a full bear hug. As children grow up, they might not be too eager for cuddling. Toussle their hair, pat their back, or have some kind of physical connection with them throughout the day. You don’t need to keep a tab on the number of times you do it — just keep it all normal. When they come in after school after a long day, talk to them about their day while you hold their hand or give them a foot massage – make them feel loved.

Be Playful

Include a bit of play and fun in everything you do. Kids do not respond well to orders like, “finish your breakfast”, “go to bed”, or “clean your room”. If you can infuse a bit of fun in everything, then it stops being an order and becomes a sort of playful fun thing to do. Tell them stories, sing songs, dance with them, play ball, be active, and be like them when you interact. There are times when you need to treat them like they have grown up and then there are times when you need to act like you are a child, too!

Have One-On-One Time Every Day

However busy you are, make sure to make time for your little one every day at least for 15 minutes. You should be spending this much time with each of your kids. If your child is not ready to do anything with you, make a deal with them so that you can do what they like on one day, and what you like the next. When you have your day, fill it with fun activities that will get them laughing.

Empathize

As kids grow up, they become estranged with their parents because they feel judged all the time. Resist the need to tell them what is the right thing to do at times and instead listen without interrupting as they pour their heart out. If you tell them what to do, what is right, and what is wrong, chances are they are never going to come back to you again. Encourage them to open up to you about what is going on in their lives. If you can truly build a great connection with your kids, they will come to you first thing if they are ever in trouble. Empathize with them, be a good listener, and try to understand their perspective.

Importance Of Bedtime

Bedtimes are very important, so set your child’s bedtime in such a way that you get to spend a lot of time with them. For younger kids, reading before bedtime is great. Kids come up with all kinds of ideas or thoughts, and they tend to babble endlessly, so listen to it all and explain as best as you can. For older kids, have a small chat before they go to bed. If they have any issues, try to assure them that you will help you solve it all.

These tips will help any parent have a great bond with their kids. However, you should stay away from gadgets when interacting with kids as they might feel unwanted or learn from your habits as well. Take it slow at times and savor every moment. Kids grow up too fast, so stop and enjoy the now!