Top Warning Signs You Are In A Bad Marriage

Family CounselingJanuary 27, 2021

Marriage is no child’s play. While the prospect of entering holy matrimony no doubt sounds exciting, there are much more than mere lovey-dovey moments and fun-filled days! Worse, if the marriage fails to stand hard times or there’s zero understanding and respect for partners- the bond will start crumbling. Bad marriages cause a substantial dip in a person’s otherwise solid self-esteem. Don’t be surprised to see yourself depressed, angry, and living in a constant state of anxiety all the time.

But that doesn’t indicate it’s too late (if it’s actually not). You can always try saving the marriage first, before taking a hard decision. No matter what, both the partners need to identify the telltale signs of problems that keep emanating and make concerted efforts to work and fix the same. Talking about the red flags, here are a few that you should stay alert about.

You Have Stopped Spending Quality Time With Each Other

Right after work, do you find yourself changing clothes, snacking on something, and then heading towards some cozy, private corner of the house? Do you often carry work to your home that you can’t wait to slip into your nightwear and take out the laptop once again? Or have you made your arrangements to relax and not ask your partner about the day?

Unwinding is everyone’s right, but why miss out on the fun of hanging out with each other, just to catch up with the day’s highlight maybe! Also, everyone needs their ‘me’ time, but spending too much time by oneself and not with the partner is also something to worry about.

You Don’t Fight Anymore

Sounds amazing, right? But this is a counterintuitive statement! A good degree of anger against the spouse sometimes helps resolve pent up frustrations. And you might save your relationship from going down the gutters, by engaging in a healthy fight. Imagine situations where you can’t even speak openly to each other or remain standoffish not to listen anymore.

This way, problems keep accumulating and eventually lead to disastrous ends. Lack of fighting is akin to staying indifferent, and that’s not welcome. But if you fight, it implies you have a chance of making things work out. But there’s no point in doing so if you drift from the topic and take up each others’ faults or bring up past events and judge at present. That’s too lame and amateurish!

You Don’t Talk About Money Anymore

Marriages crumble before the eyes for multiple reasons, among which monetary matters is a significant one. In general, one spouse tends to control the money, including budgeting, handling investments, bank details, paying bills, fulfilling EMIs, and so on. However, that doesn’t necessitate that the information would stand hidden from the other partner. These concern the lives and livelihoods of both. So why keep it under wraps?

If that’s the case, there are chances your partner might be hiding or lying about something that you deserve to know. Often spouses develop addiction towards gambling or hide money for their personal fulfillment. Know this for a fact -communication gaps can pave the way for a marriage to fall apart. To top it all, if there are money issues, it will undoubtedly hinder maintaining the relationship’s strength.

You Avoid Uncomfortable Conversations

Uncomfortable conversations should not take a backseat. After all, these are part and parcel of your life that you must make it a point to discuss with your better half. But have you or your partner turned indifferent and scared to tackle these questions? Is this because you feel the outcome won’t be a good one?

Discords in marital bonds are common and as mature adults. You must know where to draw the line. But not having disagreements or adopting a passive stance every time something brews up is not healthy.

Spouses need to work together, respecting their differences and learning to come to a mutually agreed-upon solution. But if they view each other as contenders and not partners, there is no need to stay in the marriage. After all, living a happy life is a joint decision, and both need to realize that. You could always seek professional help to sort out the differences and work on your marriage. Don’t you agree?