Four Tips To Help Your Kids Have Fun During Post-Divorce Holidays

Family CounselingOctober 23, 2019

The separation of parents can take a toll on kids, and reports suggest that a divorce can often lead to a deterioration in their mental health. Parents should make a point that any kind of difference between them must not have any negative effect on their kids’ upbringing. The kind of childhood that a kid experiences shapes up how their future might look like, and if they get affected in any way, that will reflect on their future and personality as well.

As far as holidays are concerned, kids find it tough to divide their time between their mom and dad. Imagine a child spending time with his or her mother on a holiday trip and getting back home to live separately with his or her father. How do they cope up with that? Of course, parents need to make it look easy.

Don’t Hold Your Child Responsible For Vacation Schedules

If you inform your child that you would miss them on an upcoming holiday, they would feel apologetic and would try out of their way to perk you up or make things easier for you. They would seek ways in which they can make up for their absence and make you happy. The unfortunate part is, your child is unable to help you, and that might make them feel bad. Your child is restricted by the schedule that has been set, and he or she has nothing to do with it. It’s not their fault at all — they can’t choose. That’s beyond their capacity. Therefore, do not hold them responsible for a sudden change in schedule.

Let Them Enjoy A Holiday Irrespective Of Who They Are With

Things can be disastrous if you or your current partner pass a derogatory comment about the other parent in front of a child. The parent who stays with the kid must keep this in mind and make sure that such things must never happen. Whosoever is interacting with your child or in their presence must be made known of this golden rule. Such issues can have a detrimental effect on your child’s mind and can put them under stress. If your kid is on a holiday, try to make it as stress-free as you can. It doesn’t matter whether they are vacationing with you or your present or ex-partner.

Kids Should Not Be Restricted

Kids must have the liberty to discuss with one parent and relate all the good times they have spent with the other parent. Always remember that you must not pass any derogatory comment or make facial expressions that might convey ill feelings towards the other parent when you are in front of your kid. Do not interrogate or question what your child has been doing with the other parent or force them to tell you where they have been with the other parent. Your child will surely appreciate your silence. This way, you might also come to know about what’s going on in your former partner’s life.

You Must Not Put Your Kid Under Stress

You need to ensure that your kid’s experience is pleasant and doesn’t put them under stress. They might need to take some clothes, shoes, special toys, and blankets with them while going on a vacation, and you should allow them to visit the noncustodial parent (your ex) and take the things they must carry during their trip. Do not try to set rules for exchanges. If your kid wants to bring a number of toys from your ex’s home, let them do so. As a custodial parent, you need to understand the pain of your kid and should not offend the kid in any way. Do keep this in mind that you need to be smart and understand the psyche of your bundle of joy.

If you want to see your child happy, always try to find out what they want. Take their point of view into account and respect their feelings and their desire to be in their comfort zone. There are a lot of things that you can have under your control and make your little one’s holiday a memorable as well as an enjoyable one. Work towards making their childhood better as it is your first and foremost responsibility as a parent. It doesn’t matter if you are separated or divorced. Your child should matter to you the most.