What is a Helicopter Parent? Find Out
Have you ever been to a party full of kids, and admonished the parents of the naughty ones in your mind? You probably vowed never to become a parent like them. However, parenting is not an easy job. But being good parents means creating a balance between being a disciplinarian yet giving them enough freedom so that they can take their own decisions. It is hard to decipher exactly when to hold on to your reigns and when to loosen them up. The coinage “helicopter parent” is not too old. In case you didn’t know, helicopter parents are those who hover around their kids all the time and won’t let their children make their own decisions. Often, they are known to intervene in their kid’s life even when they have left the house for college. What they don’t understand is that being overprotective and control freaks can have negative impacts on their child’s mental health.
Here are some warning signs that you were brought up by helicopter parents and how you can work around them.
You Are A Perfectionist
From a young age, kids are tricked into believing that having numerous degrees and credentials are good for them. Helicopter parents tend to inculcate the seeds of this kind of thoughts in their kid’s mind, making them feel that they will only be successful with these in their name. Anything less would make them incompetent.
Experts say that if you are a perfectionist who keeps acquiring new degrees and certifications, you might want to stop and listen to what your heart says for once. Do you really want to go to law college and make your parents proud? Or do you want to follow your heart, be happy with a lower-paying job and choose to have a degree in art? Often, in our rat race to be the best and get big degrees in our names, we tend to forget what gives us real happiness. Ask yourself difficult questions and see if you can answer them honestly.
You Suffer From Anxiety
When parents are overprotective about their children, always dictating their every action, children grow up believing that, without their parents, they would be lost. They tend to think that only their parents can make every situation right which makes them too dependent. Hence, when things go wrong and their parents are not nearby, they become anxious. In fact, they suffer from anxiety regarding every small issue.
One way to lessen your anxiety is by practicing meditation and mindfulness. When you do it, you learn to accept yourself as you are. It becomes easier to treat anxiety as something you can conquer and not something which you should act upon.
For Every Decision You Take, You Have To Ask Your Parents
Do you find decision-making a challenging thing? It might have something to do with your parents and the way they brought you up. Helicopter parents intervene too much in their children’s life. While children do need their parents to help them while growing up, overdoing this means they might grow up with stunted decision-making skills.
Experts opine that children should make mistakes so that they understand it better. One wrong decision won’t destroy them, so parents must relax and give them enough breathing space to grow and lead their lives.
Your Parents Are Your Best Friends
No, there is nothing wrong with calling one of your parents your best friend. But it might become an issue if you have very few real friends and spend most of your time online or with your parents. With the lessening generation gap, children find it easier to talk about everything with their parents. While this is a very good sign, it also means that you hardly venture out of your comfort zone to meet new people or make new friends. It affects your social skills, and in case, you didn’t know, having good social skills keep your brain active in our old age.
Improve your social skills by joining a new club or activity, or meet up with your virtual friends. You don’t have to become popular, but making new friends will have a positive effect on your mental health and even open new doors in terms of relationship as well as careers.
Have you noticed anyone who might have similar traits or have you met a helicopter parent? If yes, help them get out of their shell. If you feel like you are a helicopter parent, might become one in the future, or raised by one, it is not too late to change. If you get out of your familiar zone, you can scale greater success in life.
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